[History was made at this yearÕs Commencement ceremony for Lake Highlands High School. Students, faculty and parents were mesmerized by the inspirational challenge delivered by this yearÕs Commencement speaker, His Most Excellent and Magnanimous Potentate Self Ð the Keffi Lama. An obscure leader from an unfamiliar part of the word instantaneously impressed the spellbound audience with his simple yet profound wisdom. By permission of the ÒLama Institute for Greater Consciousness (without feeling bloated),Ó the Advocate is printing the following excerpts from his speech.]
ÒI am filled with awe, like a doughnut with jelly, when I gaze out over the audience and see your faces. I canÕt help but immediately wonder Ð who are you? And then I remember that I am not in my homeland of Hopscotchistan, so IÕm not supposed to know you.
As I listened to the angelic voice of the young girl who just sang, I closed my eyes, I recalled a distant memory of when I had hair, and then I went to sleep.
I have been asked to share the wisdom of my years with you. But my wisdom is the wisdom of my father and his father before him Ð but not my great-grandfather, I think he was some sort of village doofus.
What can I tell you about life that can equate to living? What can I tell you about pain that can equate to forgiving? I donÕt know, but I think I should be delivering this speech in Nashville.
Many wise men have said that you are what you eat. If that is true, then I should be a big, stinking hunk of sushi. So donÕt always believe what the supposed wise men say.
The first step to wisdom is recognizing that it is not wise to talk back to a policeman. The second step is realizing that you can vote, too.
The third step is remembering that your parents might actually have had something to do with getting you this far. The fourth step is being content with legal forms of recreation. The fifth step is conceding that you are a lot less wise than you thought Ð a lesson that is quietly learned involuntarily if necessary during the first week as a college freshman.
Many of you might ask did I Ð the Keffi Lama Ð learn these five steps to wisdom when I was your age? Many others might ask do I have a brother named Dali Lama? Or you might ask do I have a sister named Dolly Parton? Still, some of the rest of you might be asking what time is it?
To all of you I offer the same answer. The Keffi Lama is inscrutable. He is an enigma. Wisdom is not a destination; it is a journey. But Tahiti Ð now thereÕs a destination!
Neighborhood resident Bill Keffer writes a monthly opinion column about neighborhood issues. His opinions are not necessarily those of the Advocate or its management. Send comments and ideas to him at 6301 Gaston, Suite 820, Dallas 75214; FAX to 214-823-8866; or e-mail to editor@advocatemag.com.
