There may be no free lunches, but at the lake, there’s free advice

Got a problem you’re struggling with? Maybe you’re ad odds with your boss, or just can’t choose between stripes or florals for your new curtains.

If you’ve bent the ear of your friends and family and still don’t have an answer, you might try going to White Rock Lake one Sunday. Sure, you can clear your head with a walk. But even better, you can talk to some men who are there for no other reason than to help you out – for free.

Sign up for our newsletter

* indicates required

They’re local residents Roderick MacElwain and Neal Caldwell, better known by man as the Free Advice Guys.

The two friends have spent their Sunday afternoons at the park for years, doling out advice on just about anything to anyone who asks for it.

How did they get started doing it? With a piece of advice, appropriately enough.

Eight years ago, Caldwell told MacElwain about his desire to communicate better and received  a simple solution: Go to White Rock Lake, where there’s always plenty of people, and talk.

Caldwell thought he’d offer free advice as a way of talking to strangers, and MacElwain decided to join him. They found a spot north of T.P. Hill, spread out a blanket, a couple of chairs and a “Free Advice” sign, for what they both thought would be a one-time gig.

It didn’t go so well at first. “The first hour and a half was horrendously uncomfortable,” says MacElwain. “I think we were uptight, so nobody wanted to talk to us.”

“I can remember just feeling very awkward,” Caldwell adds of their first time out. “Any time you go out in public with a sign, you’re gonna get some strange looks, and you feel like everybody’s looking at you.”

Lots of people were looking at them. But finally, some stopped looking and went to see what they were about. Soon the pair started answering real questions, and they realized they loved doing it.

“We were hooked,” MacElwain says. “And very quickly, people got used to us. Within a couple of months it was like we’d been doing it forever.”

Ever since, there’s hardly been a Sunday that one of the men isn’t there. And if it’s too cold or wet to be outside, they set up shop at Whole Foods on Greenville.

Why be so determined to advise? “It becomes a funny habit that grabs you,” MacElwain says. “Since we’ve been doing  it, there’s not been four times that we haven’t raised the flag. Most years we don’t even miss a day.”

Both say they believe they’ve helped hundreds of people along the way, on a wide variety of issues.

“The only real request we’ve ever made of the questioner is that it’s a sincere question,” Caldwell says. “It can be about anything.

“There have been some very, very intimate questions, some very real questions and situations. I’ve had people who are saddened by the loss of a relationship, a loved one, or being kicked out of their homes,” he says.

“Probably 30 percent or so is work-oriented,” adds MacElwain. “That could be how to deal with a boss, get a raise, leave without burning bridges, start a job search.

“And we get a lot of relationship questions. I think we do a real good job on those, because we don’t take the counseling approach. We’re much more practical.”

Just what makes them worthy of telling the rest of us what to do? It’s a question they get often, and both are quick to say they don’t know everything.

Sure, each says the other is a smart guy. “Roderick is an incredible intellect. Just off the charts,” says Caldwell.

“Neal is inherently smart and wise in a lot of areas,” MacElwain adds. “He has a take that’s more poetic than mine. I have more of a Spockian approach, more nuts and bolts.”

But more importantly, the 50-somethings say, is that they have plenty of life experiences, a willingness to listen and a true desire to help.

“A lot of times we’ve helped people not by having an answer or an interesting way of looking at it, but just by letting them talk and being as supportive and neutral as possible. Many times, you can just see them open up and realize things. And we really didn’t do anything, but just be decent, respectful human beings,” says MacElwain.

Many people they’ve advised have come back to thank them and tell them how it all worked out.

They’ve even received offers of payment, though they never accept them. “We say they’re flattered and honored, and politely say no,” Caldwell says. “To me, the act of doing it is the rewarding part.”